Monday, July 27, 2009

I'll steal your honey like I stole your bike

I have written a song. Please don't judge me as this is my first attempt but I figure at some point I have to follow the trend and jump from being a simple blogger to an award winning Grammy artist. So here it goes:

Love You Long Time had a bunch of hits
Craigos makes me sick
And I think its fly when girls stop by for the 7 week break, for the break.
I like girls that wear American Apparel
I'd take her to the cocoa bean if I had one wish
but she'll be here for the break
for the break.

What do you think? I know its just the chorus but I think I might be on to something. Now I just need a good beat, maybe I can rip off an LFO song......

Thursday, July 23, 2009

T-minus 7 weeks

Do you smell that? That's the smell of football season being right around the corner. Or it could be that I haven't showered yet today but really they smell about the same anyways so what does it matter. Alot of you are thinking "ya 7 week break! OMG!" well you are wrong, its a 7 week count down until the first week of the season. And it defiantly isn't a break. Shoot, training camps open up next week, then you have preseason games, roster cuts and of course close ups of Tom Brady's knee. So please there is no need to cry for me Marge and Tina this 7 week break. For I will have football to be my constant companion. In fact I might not even know you were gone.............PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS GOOD AND DECENT, DON'T LEAVE ME! I HATE FOOTBALL! I SWEAR, IT DIDN'T MEAN ANYTHING TO ME! PLEASE I'LL DO ANYTHING!
ahem, sorry about that my phone always picks up the neighbors calls and they are always fighting about something. Married people, what are you going to do? Can't live with them, can't live next to them.

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Bat out of hell part IV

A wise dinner entree once said "I would do anything for love, but I won't do that" I've always wondered what that one thing was that he wouldn't do for love and it made me want to make a list of things I would and would not do. I figure Meatloaf and I have a lot in common so I'm sure that this list will be close to his.

1. Will do - Eat meatloaf. Even if her cooking is not that good I'm sure I have had worse, so why not down it in the name of love.

2 Won't do - Eat Meatloaf. That's cannibalism brotha! Not to mention its wrong in so many ways.

3 Will do/won't do - Walk 500 miles. This one is a toss up. First why are we walking 500 miles? Is it for charity? Are there no more cars? Are we doing one of those pioneer treks? Will there be treats? I would have to say walk 500 miles is a won't do. Drive 500 miles, totally down.

4. Will do - Watch a chick flick. I could do this one in my sleep. But seriously I have learned how to sleep with my eyes open so I would just sleep through the whole movie.
5. Will do - Go shopping. But there is a time limit on this. 2 hours tops! And I can't stress this enough, you must keep me well fed or else suffer the consequences.

6. Won't do - Write you a love song. Not even if you ask for one or if you need one. I just won't write you a love song.

7. Won't do - Anything during the game.... any game.

Actually this video pretty much sums it all up.